Delusions of Grandeur

So, for those of you who read my last post, it was kind of a downer. I have vacillated between wanting to delete it and all the evidence of my humanly weakness… and leaving it up because I am human and I have weaknesses.

The point of this blog, and/or ANY social media that I use and post on, is not to present a false perfectionist idealism. I don’t want people to think that my life is perfect because it’s not. No one’s is. And how relate-able am I going to be, how many hearts can I touch if I’m already making myself out to be better than others?

No, my friends. I am not perfect. I have many faults and flaws. One of them, and the topic for today’s post, is that I occasionally have Delusions of Grandeur.

Let me give you an example.

Recently, I was hired to do some full time blog work for a company that I love and respect. I got really excited, and my writer’s imagination kicked into full gear. The blog posts I wrote were going to be so amazing and successful that it would bolster the business into exploding from success! The owner would be on the Ellen show to talk about how amazing her business is, how many lives she has touched, etc, etc… In the background, I would be standing demurely with my hands crossed, smiling slightly because it was MY writing that made it all possible. Yay and hooray.

This was all BEFORE I had even written the first post, btw.

Back to reality. I had to talk myself down from the pedestal because if this business succeeds (and I REALLY want it to because I am an avid customer), it will be because it’s an amazing business with an incredibly dedicated and passionate owner. Not because I wrote a cool article about chia seeds. If you want to know more, head over to this site and check it out. I truly believe in it.

Let’s add to that. In addition to being the full-time blogger for her site and business, I decided I wanted to be an excellent example for the business as well. A few months ago, I would have sworn that, by now, I would be at my goal weight, flexing my ‘ceps in front of a camera to show that, “Yes, it really does work.”

It does. It works.

Unless you’re me, and you have mighty delusions of grandeur, but less self control and dedication (and less eating disorders).

We read about inspiring over-night success stories all the time. But these are the exceptions, not the norm. Still, with the rise of social media and the ability to receive information within seconds at the touch of a finger, is it any wonder that I’m plagued by these delusions? I don’t have the answer for that. And I don’t think I’m the only one that has the problem (if it can be called a problem).

I believe it’s in our nature to want to succeed, to push past everyone else, to become the Hero, the Captain, the CEO, the President… but why? What’s in it for us when/if we achieve the highest level of success?

Satisfaction, adulation, adoration, power, popularity? Grandeur?

Back to the personal… What’s in it for ME? If the blog is successful in even bringing ONE extra customer, it will be for the benefit of the business in question and its owner. That thought makes me happy. Is that because I’m an altruist? Or a narcissist?

It’s worth thinking about.

Sometimes Delusions of Grandeur can be amazing. They can be inspiring, motivating and empowering. You imagine yourself the success, you hunger for it, and then you work towards it. Hopefully, you do.

If you don’t want to put in the time and the work, where does that leave you? Eyes on the clouds as you walk through the streets? Wishing, instead of living? Hoping instead of being. C’est une possibilite. And can we really be happy in that state? J’en doute.

Conclusion. Do I set my sights lower? Perhaps. It’s beneficial to “Live in the NOW”, as Garth so poignantly put it in Wayne’s World, because we can’t progress at all if we don’t know where we are. I see myself as one step above mediocre and that’s because I’ve taken the time to truly get to know myself and so I know where I’m at compared to what my potential is (if one can even know their own full potential).

I’ve started compiling a list of meta-goals to get me out of the sludge of mediocrity. The goal itself being -> Baby Steps out of Mediocrity. Eloquent, I know. Anyway, that’s what my next post is about. So stay tuned.

And uh, keep having delusions. Sometimes the fictional world is more fun than the real world. Just aim it high enough that you don’t get too depressed when you return to “live in the now.”

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