I have a dark sense of humor

I don’t know why, but I find it hilarious that people think clowns are scary. I understand why, because clowns have been used for years to convey a dark, murderous intent. “Look at me, kid. I’m harmless, have a lollipop–AAH”-bite your face off.
So on Halloween, I decided I needed to be a clown. I wore dirty suspenders, a flannel shirt, and I put oil and twigs in my hair. I had forgotten that I’d volunteered to help in my 1st grader’s class party though…and the moment I walked in the door, the kids freaked out. I compensated by acting extra cheerful and sweet, but every once in a while, I saw a tiny fearful face turned my way, and I had to stifle a laugh.
On the same night, I stopped at Kneaders for a late meal with a friend. The lady behind the counter was so upset by my face paint that she refused to serve me (true story!!), and she had the manager come out to take my order. He told me that I was truly terrifying. I was so gratified.

Aug 3, 2016- wow my hair was so short.

One day, I decided to play with prosthetic makeup a bit. Oh…maybe I should have mentioned that I’m a makeup artist.
Ahem. I am a makeup artist.
Anyway, I plonked this pencil on my head with some latex and puddy, painted it, and then ran down the stairs. My (then) 10 year old son was in the den, playing video games with a small group of friends. I ran in the room and said, “Son! I need to go to the emergency room, I tripped and this pencil got stuck in my head!”
Knowing me, my son just laughed and rolled his eyes. One of his friends though, started to stand up with a horrified expression on his face, covering his mouth with shock. I had to hurry and pull the prosthetic off, showing him that it was just makeup. Then I texted his mom, apologizing for the trauma I’d possibly inflicted on her poor son.
When I left the room that day, I heard one boy say to my son, “Dude, your mom is so weird.”
Hahahaha! Awesome.

Sept 14, 2016 – favorite part of this is the little veins I drew in.

Sadly, I didn’t get to scare anyone but my immediate family with this one. If you’ve ever read Scary Stories to tell in the Dark, you might remember the story about a girl who had a spider lay an egg sack in her cheek. That was my inspiration for this look. I got a lot of great reactions on my social media page for this. A lot of people were grossed out. So much fun.

2014

My father-in-law is deathly terrified of snakes. I love him to death, but I had to admit that he was my inspiration for this one. I did this and sent him a picture. He said something like, “What did you do to my Jenny? How could you do this to me?”
Oh, and my hair used to be black. That’s not a wig.

Feb 14, 2017

Last, but not least, my very romantic Valentines day makeup. I felt like there were always a lot of Valentines Day makeup tutorials and looks posted all over social media, but they were always very predictable and pretty. I figured it was time to shake things up a little, so this is how I painted my face. I used prosthetics to “carve” the words into my forehead, creating a manic “in love” look. Smeared lipstick and eye makeup completed it. When I approached my husband and asked him to be my valentine, his response was, “Uhhh…”
Don’t worry. He still loves me.

I have a few more. I love painting skull faces, though I haven’t done one in a long time and I would like to see how much I’ve progressed over the years. I haven’t painted my face in a long time, actually.

If you think of something truly terrifying that you’d like to see, leave a comment and I will see what I can do. In the meantime, enjoy this one…

All the prosthetics in this picture are home made by me. I even made the teeth out of Polymorph plastic. Some lady online told me that I was a very sick individual. I laughed so hard…

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